Sunday, October 19, 2014

Letter to Bubu

There are just a few people that I have met that "literally" blew my mind. From the first time I saw this woman on WWTBAM (Who wants to be a millionaire) on TV and I thought "Wow,this woman is pretty"; then I met her at GTB autism seminar in 2011 till I finally heard her story in June 2011 and up till now, my respect and love for her just keeps growing.
October 19, 2012; she wrote a letter to her son on his birthday. It blessed my life and I know it can bless yours too. So I got permission to share it then. And I want to share it again with you.

"An open letter to Bubu from his mummy on his 6th birthday.

Hey Baby, it's your birthday today and am almost moved to tears taking a trip down the path you've come. For a kid so young, you have lived a hundred years beyond your age and all with a smile on your face, eyes twinkling and a rich laugh to go.

We knew you were definitely going to be a special child before you were born, you see complications from multiple surgeries had damaged mummy's reproductive organs and the doctors had said you couldn't be birth (not without assisted reproductive techniques anyway but the Great Man above had other plans. )
The name "CHUKWUEBUKA" was chosen years before the miracle that was you came along, before even daddy came along (- I will tell you a lot more about the man your father is when you are a bit older). I was convinced despite what the doctors where saying, that God was gonna show what a Great God He is. The world was in need of Joshua's for this generation and I believed that the gift that would be you would be one of them.

Fast forward a couple years, soooooooooo much more than I can recount here now has gone on, mum and dad are together now (a crazy enterprise for dad really) and are trying to workout a path to you through IVF when you burst through to the shock and amazement of everyone, the doctors at the reproduction center, us , everyone but God who had decided you were coming and not through IVF. Initially we were skeptical, it couldn't be.... how was it even possible???? But alas weeks after we could confirm you were there alright, smack in the uterus, how you got there, till today we would never know and honestly don't care. You were there and that was all that mattered.

You made landfall, six years ago to the sound of grandma and her sisters singing at the top of their voices in the hospital to the amusement and I dare say the irritation of the nurses and other patients. But there you were - tiny, breathing, crying, brand spanking new and I would never forget the rush of emotions. Daddy was right there sweating profusely, looking like he was the one that they had cut you out of, lol. What a precious gift???? What a unique child, conceived on Avenue Tedesco, born on Hospital Drive and bred on Ademola Close, who can beat such an exotic start???

Your first years were better than we could have expected as new parents. We poured through the books trying to keep up, checking up on monthly milestones and charting your progress and you exceeded them each month, you were used as the yardstick to measure the other kids around. You held ur head, crawled walked and started talking. I remember I was soooo pained your first words were dada and I started drilling you everyday to see if you would switch to mama - you didn't but on Christmas day while in church 2 months after your 1st birthday and months after you started saying everything but that, you finally called me mama, very loudly to the amusement of all.

Even as a kid you showed a great love for music and would run around the house singing rhymes. But a dark cloud appeared to be looming, it started with repeat bouts of upper respiratory tract infections, we were told it was expected, you sucked your fingers so as a toddler you were exposed to lots of stuff that could cause infections via the sucking, hmmm, ok. We took antibiotics for that, lots of it. Then it was chronic constipation, dietary change wasn't cutting it, they put you on daily laxatives, it didn't cut it still, we got worried, then the straw that broke the camels back, you received a seemingly harmless shot and got ill, we went on admission, came out and you started stuttering, then struggling to speak, then you lost all speech totally. Like it wasn't enough already, the wardrobe door unhinged and landed on your head in a freak accident that still defies explanation till date. Immune dysfunction, mecury toxicity, head trauma, hypothyroidism, mitochondrial dysfunction, you name it, we have known it. It was the commencement of a journey that eventually led us down the rabbits hole to regressive autism.

The day you finally got officially diagnosed, almost 8 months later following a lot of drama, you and I shared a moment I want to share with you. At this point, I had started working with you personally, not knowing much, all we knew was we needed to keep your brain stimulated while awaiting diagnosis and we did. That night I lay in bed with you and had a conversation that went like this " Bubu, am sure you heard what the doc said this afternoon, but what the doc didn't know is that you are not just an ordinary boy. You already made it into this world when it had been said you wouldn't, you won that fight. You've got another battle on your hand now that you need to gear up for. I promise to fight with you and for you with everything I got but to do that you have to officially appoint me your arbiter be4 God, so I can have the authority to speak on your behalf till your able to, if you agree to this, shake my hand and it will be the sign of our agreement".

To my greatest surprise, you got up from the bed, knelt over me, shed a tear from just your left eye, brought your hands out and shook my hand. If there was ever a time I would have broken down, it would have been then, but you still had more in you. You held my hand and said very audibly, in a voice I hadn't heard in over 8months, the word - APPLE. I was gobsmacked, this was one of the words we had been working with you on and wasn't even sure you were paying attention to it and you had just said it, very clearly. That for me was all I needed. It was for me, the confirmation that we were yet again going to win another battle.

We knew it wasn't gonna be easy, but we knew the victory was already ours and pledged to do all we can to make sure we got you all you needed and then let God do His bit. Fast forward again to date and what an adventure it has been. I have never known anyone work as hard as you have in life, God's grace has just been upon you causing you to make ridiculous progress despite continuos challenges. Today on your 6th birthday, we are so close to the finish line, it is so tantalizingly close, we can see it.

We are buckling down for that final push, you are ready for it and with God on our side we've made it already. I write you today publicly cause I want you to be able to come back to see the day and time I knew for sure we were home free. What ever lies ahead, WE ARE HOME FREE. We love you beyond measure son and celebrate you with the world today. We are so proud of you, our little musician, it,maths/puzzle guru. The world is yours to conquer and conquer it you shall. May God continue to bless and increase you in all good things today and always.


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HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUBU!!! (Oct 19)"